Men Are the New Women

As seen on Oprah:

Meet Thomas the pregnant man. Thomas Beatie is a normal man with a beard and a mustache and he has a belly, and there’s a real baby girl in it. Just in case you have a hard time getting your head around the notion of a pregnant man, it gets better. Thomas the pregnant man was formerly known as Tracy. Tracy was a very pretty girl and once won a pageant as Miss Hawaii Teen USA. Why Tracy wanted to become a man isn’t particularly relevant, but Thomas did explain that before going in for his sex change operation, he made the conscious decision to keep his reproductive organs intact. Just in case he might want to have his own children someday.

Meet Nancy, she’s Thomas the pregnant man’s wife. Thomas and Nancy, as well as Nancy’s two older daughters from a previous marriage say they’re just a normal family. An average, boring family who just wants to have kids like everybody else. Nancy can’t have babies anymore since her uterus was removed after health complications, so isn’t it lucky that Thomas kept his uterus? Thomas is such a thoughtful man. “But wait!” Says Thomas the pregnant man, “What will the tabloids say? They just might make fun of us. Ooh, at six month I’m really showing, people at work are wondering. Oh, I know! Oprah will help us, she helps everybody! She’ll make the people understand that it’s perfectly normal for a husband to get pregnant. Maybe she’ll even be our love child’s godmother! Quick, let’s go see Oprah before the tabloids get their hands on this story, she’ll make people love us”.

Here’s what Lee had to say on the topic: “The thing that pisses me off about that kind of stuff is that people give no thought to the consequences on the child. It’s all about the “experience”. Yeah, well the experience results in a child – someone else [who doesn’t have a say in how she’s being brought into the world]. Jesus: Yep my mind’s made up. I want to be a man. Ouch! that hurt but doesn’t matter I’m a man now Yay! but wait a minute, my unfulfilled uterus is crying out – make me whole! make me whole!

As for me, I look at a story like that and I think it’s no wonder so many people in this world view America as the epitome of decadence and immorality, an empire on the decline. I can all too well imagine that from an outside perspective it must look like we’re so rich and so pampered that people don’t know what to do with themselves anymore, so they’ve devised these games where they cut each other up and move stuff around and sometimes exchange pieces too: “I’ll give you one penis and a beard for two boobs and a uterus. Deal!”. This when a disproportionate percentage of the world doesn’t have access to basic medical care. It’s just indecent.

Thomas was bemoaning the fact that there are no “man-ternity” clothes (his words). I say wear a fucking dress. That way, you’ll be the pregnant man who wears dresses. You’re already turned yourself into a freak as it is, why stop there? But seriously now, is he really imagining a world where pregnant men become the norm? I pride myself on being open minded and accepting of people as they are. However, we all have our boundaries and this situation just doesn’t work for me. Maybe as a circus act. But even then, I’ve never been into the freak shows personally.

I just have this to say to Thomas:
YOU WANT TO BE HAVING BABIES INSIDE YOU? THAT MAKES YOU A WOMAN!!!!!!

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