Insight

When I think of all the years and months I spent looking for true love in the course of my life, it saddens me a little. Not so much because I didn’t find what I was looking for, but rather because I think of all that time I could have put to better use. All the books I could have read, photographs taken, drawings I could have drawn, ideas and seeds I could have planted in the ground. I was determined to beat the odds, that I would find love according to my own schedule. What I found has come and gone and now that it’s all said and done, I’m left wondering why I felt compelled to keep searching far and wide, when all along I was doing just fine on my own. There is something ironic about the fact that I’ve found this perspective while going through a major depression. But I guess that’s the way it goes, you never do know where your next insight is going to come from.

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2 thoughts on “Insight

  1. This is a pretty old post, but the comments are still relatable. I agree that searching for love is a waste of time. It’s forced, and often leaves you accepting what is objectively unacceptable. Although, sometimes love finds you. I’m still debating if time spent on love found is also a waste of time. If you’ve figured that out please let me know.

    • “It’s forced, and often leaves you accepting what is objectively unacceptable”. Have to agree with that. As for love finding you, I think it pretty well amounts to the same. I think most of the time we’re willing to accept whatever comes our way because it seems better than just being alone. What do I know? Depends what day you ask me. Sometimes I think there is no substitute for true love. Other times I think “love” is just a crock we invent to make life seem more tolerable.

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