Something is Better than Nothing.

The Letter

“It is much more entertaining to be boring than to be interesting.”
~ Amélie Nothomb

I just came across that quote today. I’m not sure whether I like Nothomb as a writer or not. Someone gave me one of her books once and I couldn’t get past the first fifty pages because it just seemed too depressing to me. I haven’t tried reading anything of hers since, but this quote works for me. Kind of takes the pressure off. I feel like I’ve painted myself into a corner. Having come to the understanding that what motivated my choices and actions before was the desire to perform for performance’s sake, and having understood how futile that is, I’ve been avoiding anything remotely close to performing, or putting on a show, or painting on a prettier face to try to make a good impression.

But of course, since I have this blog that I put out there every day, I can’t help but hope for an audience. Only what kind of show to you put on for an invisible audience which is mostly consisted of your own mom and dad when the writer and director are on strike, all the other actors have taken on other projects and taken the lights and sound men with them, and all the props, costumes, and makeup are locked away? You do what you gotta do. Sometimes the motivation is there, and most times it isn’t but you just keep on putting on a show, however sparse and minimalistic it might be. Some days you don’t even want to bother to get out of bed, and though you fight it, sometimes that force wins over after all. Given the circumstances and what’s left to work with, there’s nothing scarier than feeling like you still have to be entertaining, charming, amusing and most of all, interesting. So boring is where it’s at. Not bored mind you. Just real and not particularly joyful or fun.

The picture? I took it this afternoon with my camera phone as I was on my way out to buy cat food. I’ve been getting books in the mail almost every day since last week. They’re coming from all over the world thanks to this BookMooch site I’ve been talking about. I took a picture of this package right out of the mailbox because I thought it looked so nice and so bright with those pretty heart-shaped stamps from France. For some reason it doesn’t look as bright on the web as it does on my own screen. But with everything else so grey and dirty-looking outside even just a little touch of colour helps brighten up the day a little you know? It would be safe to say that those stamps were the brightest part of my day today. Which is something. Because something is definitely better than nothing.

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