All things being relative, you could say I’m doing somewhat better. I called the health hotline early on in the day where it was recommended to me to make an orange juice, boiled water and salt concoction to keep myself hydrated. I was also encouraged to eat what I can, as long as it’s not fatty and doesn’t contain much fiber. The fiber thing threw me for a loop because I’m so used to trying to get as much fiber in my diet as possible normally. I passed on the OJ and salt thing (yuck!), drank plenty of water and ate some rice and a couple of bagels with cream cheese. I still feel very nauseous, dizzy and disoriented but so far I’m keeping everything down so I suppose it’s an improvement.
I was sitting there in a vegetative state yesterday watching one James Bond movie after another on one of the movie channels and suddenly had an incredible craving for a pizza. I didn’t think it was strange considering how little I’ve been eating lately, so I had one delivered figuring it would either a) make no difference at all since I was already puking my brains out or b) make me even sicker or c) miraculously cure me. I went all out and ordered a large pizza and by the time it got here I was a little bit disgusted by the sheer size of it. I had two slices and stuffed the rest in the fridge. It didn’t make me feel better, that’s for sure. But then I figure no matter what I might have eaten, I’d probably have puked that out too anyway. I had to get rid of the rest of the pizza today because the smell of it alone was making me sick to my stomach. That should take care of pizza cravings for the next year or so.
I’ve been in contact with a few friends, one or two of which I’ve been wanting to go to the cinema with but so far haven’t ventured out because just felt too sick. We were talking about going to see It’s Complicated. The movie appeals to me but why is the title so stupid?
-“What movie did you go see?”
-“Why? Just tell me the name of the movie you saw“
and so on.
Today I walked up to the pet store and back to get my kitties the Halo dry food they crave but by the time I got back home I was feeling worse. At this point I’m probably just weakened from the lack of proper nutrition. Tomorrow I plan to go to the day hospital to do some ceramics. It’s a slow week for them and I was invited to spend some time in the workshop which will be open and available all day until Wednesday. It was my favourite part of the program while I was there and I already have my heart set on making a couple of bowls. It’ll be nice to get out of the house and enjoy a bit of company too—provided I’m well enough to go of course. If not, I guess I’ll just have to keep myself busy here at home. I promised myself I’d work out a schedule and a budget for myself before the new year, so worse comes to worse I’ll just put my nose to the grindstone and get cracking on that. Doesn’t sound terribly sexy or exciting, but those two little things have the potential to change my life, no less, and at this point, that can only be a good thing.
In other news, Mimi is being an absolute angel and huddling up closer than ever in bed at night. I think she senses I need the company. Last night I was drifting in and out of sleep and kept imagining I was surrounded by half a dozen or so of kittens and puppies who were all vying for my attention. There was lots of loud purring and soft fur to pet and I felt ecstatic. I wonder, could there be kittens in heaven?